Safety Memo

It has come to the attention of management that new PPE (Personal Protective Equipment) is necessary for a member of our team.

Apparently Lawna has entered into an awkward stage in her development where her feet may in fact be to big for her body. In light of recent falls, trips and spills we are also considering the fact that she may suffer from a depth perception disorder or more likely her torso to cranium ratio is far to great, contributing to an increase in gravitational susceptibility.

The new PPE:

shown here comes in blue and red. We’d like to also point out just how much fun, smiles and laughter these new safety measures will bring. I mean seriously look at that dad…wait maybe he’s praying.

The Management

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